Jesus As A Mushroom….

“Ancient man was perplexed by mushrooms because they seemingly produced fruit without being fertilized. The erect mushroom emerges out of the womb of the earth, sometimes from an egg-like sag (in the case of Amanita Muscaria) that can resemble a vulva. There are no seeds, and there are no stamens (male flower parts) for fertilization. It’s like the mushroom was born from a virgin.

One apparent explanation was that it was fertilized by thunder, due to the appearance of the mushroom after rain storms. A variant greek name for mushroom could be translated to a Sumerian word that means “storm-seeded”. And thunder, as we know, is the word of God. And thunder accompanies the life-giving rain from God’s mouth/penis tip. Thus, the mushroom is the Son of God, born of a virgin.

The mushroom resembles a penis, and the Amanita Muscaria with its wide, red cap would have been the mightiest of them all. That makes sense, given that the father was the mighty penis is the sky.” - John Allegro