Hmmph, same thing, every day. I have to shoo them away with a broom. Why me?

That's how I feel when I jump on a trampoline with my niece. Like an elephant...

I will never be able to adequately express my astonished appreciation for the gang of twisted minds that comment on these images of yours every day 😎1

🐘👍

Have you considered sprinkling cayenne pepper on the trampoline! It'll make the tender bottom of their feet burn. Then, when they lick their feet to make them better, it'll really make their tongues burn (or in this case, the tender end of their noses). It'll discourage them from coming back. As for the messes they leave behind - two solutions, though the first is more revenge than solution. 1) Scoop the mess into a paper shopping bag, put it on your neighbour's doorstep and light it on fire. Ring his door bell or knock loudly, then hoof it quickly to where he can't see you. When he opens his door and sees a fire on his doorstep, he'll try to put it out by stomping on it. Careful not to laugh out loud where he could hear you and potentially see you. 2) Buy a package of elephant dung beetles at PetSmart® and let them loose on a pile. In no time cat all, they'll clean it up. Mind you, your place will now be overrun with dung beetles.

(Knocking sound: stick on MDF) ¶ "Good morning, madam." ¶ "I'll get the wife." ¶ "Sorry, Mr Seagoon. I barely noticed the beard. Would you like an elephant?" ¶ "No thank you. I'm trying to give them up."

Doesn’t your town have Animal Control? Call it in. They’ll find them a good home. Or not, according to God’s will….

Can't you accept that they like the jumping?